There’s a specific three-letter word Dave Valentine is careful not to use when he bumps into a colleague at industry conventions: Dad.
That’s because his old man, Mike Valentine, is the longtime (and soon-to-be retired) CEO at BCU ($6.5B, Vernon Hills, IL). Dave followed in his father’s footsteps and today serves as chief lending and experience officer at Consumers Credit Union ($4.6B, Lake Forest, IL).
In this special Father’s Day Q&A, the duo reflects on their relationship, their careers, lessons they’ve learned from each other, and more.
Dave, what did you think about your dad’s job and the industry as you were growing up? Did you always want to follow in Mike’s footsteps and join the industry?
Dave Valentine: He’s been at BCU longer than I’ve been alive, so it’s always been a part of my life. There was no “work dad” or “home dad,” it all melded together. He’s the same dude at the office that he is at home. Seeing how much he enjoyed what he does, how much he genuinely cares about people, it didn’t seem like a job at times. I thought, maybe I need to do something like that.
I had the opportunity to work part time in the summer from when I was 16 all the way through college, so for the better part of about six years I was working different jobs at BCU. I thought it was pretty neat.
Mike, what advice did you give to Dave as he entered credit union leadership?
Mike Valentine: When he got out of school he went to Wells Fargo. That’s probably the best thing he could have done because he found out what not to do. He learned a lot about financial services, but then he said maybe there’s something to this credit union stuff.
If there’s any advice I gave, it was to give it a shot and talk to some people, so he talked to a couple of different credit unions and business partners.
Whenever we would talk, it was usually about golf and the [Chicago] Cubs and Bears. Now, Dave’s talking about work stuff, and I’ve got to pay attention. It’s kind of made it a different world for us because we have that in common.
Was there a point when you both started to feel like colleagues as well as father and son?
MV: In this big crazy market we’re in, our headquarters are literally two miles from each other, but I see Dave more on the weekends than at work. If there’s a conference we see each other, but Dave usually won’t say “Dad,” he’ll say “Mike.”
As he’s moved into senior leadership positions, we really have become colleagues. I ask him for advice on a number of things, especially my upcoming retirement. He’s in our market and he’s observant, so it’s neat because I feel like he really has my back.
DV: As I said, he’s been doing this longer than I’ve been alive, and there’s a lot of wisdom there that I constantly learn from. I’d say it’s more me receiving than giving, but I think there’s been some more give in the past few years, given how Consumers has grown as an organization and the added responsibilities I’ve been fortunate to get here.
How much do you talk about credit unions when you’re together outside of work? What’s the credit union topic that comes up the most?
DV: We’ll average it out to say about half the time. It’s part of the normal talk track when you’re talking with anyone — how are things going with your job, what’s new, etc. It’s just that he and I can go super deep on the topic. We both want to continuously learn, so if there’s a hot topic or organizational changes, that propels us into deeper conversation.
MV: I agree, it kind of ebbs and flows with what’s happening in the market. Talent kind of moves back and forth [from Consumers to BCU and vice versa], but I’ll get all over my team about what David tells me they’re doing over at Consumers, and within 15 minutes of the staff meeting he’s getting a text about it because everybody at our place knows him.
Are there areas where you disagree, whether that’s on leadership approaches, how aggressively to embrace AI, or something else?
MV: I’m slower with some of the newer things out there, and you could throw AI into that. Dave has a strong marketing sense to him. It’s interesting listening to him because sometimes I just don’t understand it. A lot of times I don’t disagree; I just don’t get it. But Dave knows about things, so I bug him to tell me what he means by something, and we pitch that back and forth.
DV: I have such a passion for the people who work here and the people who report directly to me, and I know he does as well. I want to be there for him. I want to support him. It’s that kind of leadership from the heart that’s something we definitely both have.
What are some of the toughest professional questions you’ve turned to each other for advice on?
DV: For me, it’s when I’ve been presented with opportunities as we’ve either grown and scaled or just needed to make some changes. Often it’s talking about how I’m observing the situation and thinking about approaching it, either with business strategy or org design. He’s been through a lot of things I haven’t, so that helps me make better decisions.
MV: As I was going through thoughts of retirement and succession planning, David was a fantastic sounding board for me. I almost call it a switch to him mentoring me and seeing people differently than I did. That was probably one of the more helpful things for me as I was marching down that lane for the past couple of years.
Dave, what’s the biggest leadership lesson you’ve learned from Mike?
DV: It sounds simple, but be yourself. People can suss out if you’re being inauthentic, so really lead from the heart. Take the work seriously, but don’t take yourself seriously. There’s zero difference between the person he is at home and the person he is at work. That made me understand why people enjoy working with him and want to partner with him.
You’ve got to do it your own way, but I think that’s where I saw how I can be effective. You can’t compartmentalize yourself. It’s a much better balance to just generally be the same person at home and at work.
Conversely, Mike, are there leadership lessons you’ve learned from Dave?
MV: I’m at 100,000 feet most of my life at work and rarely can I get down from there, but one of the things I’ve watched with David is his ability to get to 10,000 feet, 5,000 feet, and rise. A lot of people can’t do that. They’re either micromanaging or they’re where I am. At this point in his career, it’s so important that he do that, and one of the things I’ve watched is his ability to connect with people. It’s rare to see somebody under 40 who pays that much attention.
I have a quote that I love: “Listen to understand versus listening to respond.” Dave’s not listening to respond. He’s truly taking in the information and processing it. He may go with your thought or he may not, but you know he’s listening.
For both of you, what’s something you’ve learned from each other recently that changed your thinking?
DV: For me, watching his retirement process has been interesting because there’s really awesome stuff that he’s built over there. The board and the team at BCU have such admiration for him, and he runs the credit union so well. I’ve seen him step back and say, “This is a good time to allow someone to come in and take the reins.” That, to me, is true selflessness to the organization and putting ego aside.
Top that, Mike.
MV: Sometimes I’ll see Dave doing things at Consumers that we haven’t tired, and I’ll wonder why the heck we aren’t doing that. Dave has had some success in the mortgage business with outside LOS, and now we’ve got four or five people we’ve hired doing that. In other words, I’ve heard about it, seen it, and did something about it during the past year because of conversations with Dave.
We can talk about Dave and me, father and son, but the best thing you can have is a support system. You’ve got to be all in in this business, and if you do it right, you’re going to do it well. Every time we get together there’s a credit union topic that comes up. And it’s fun. Maybe it’s a little bit too much, but it’s great.
This interview has been edited and condensed.
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